1 2 Buckle My Shoe

Why does my life involve so much drama/stress? And why do I let it bother me. I dont feel like any of whats going on I can really avoid or that I can ignore it.

The # 1 thing is work. Its hard to get into bc if you dont work there you just wont really get it. Basically there has been some movement in management and we have a new director. Thats stressful enough. But then he starts setting even high goals and my team was already struggling to begin w/. Which, in turn, reflects poorly on me as their leader. So I had a tough love/ scared straight convo last week that seemed to turn them around for now. Just need consistent results to show my boss I am capable of this position. I feel like he wishes I wasnt here. The manager that hired me, the one who believed in me enough to risk it, left for another position in the company the week he hired me. I have never been the type to think I cant do something or that I'm not good enough. But my current boss (who was also promoted to manager at the same time I was promoting) does NOT know how to relate to me. He delivers feedback in a way that seems always negative. In the training that I have to go thru like 3 times a year its all about how I need to adapt to my employees when providing feedback. I think upper-management should have to do the same training. Anyway.... bottom line lots of goals to reach and a boss who doesnt believe in me make me very unhappy and stressed out.

The #2 is family stuff. Kelli is... a major contributor. The other day we were both over at my gparents house and we were both fixing to leave when my gma asked if Kelli still didn't have a cell phone and Gma started saying how she was going to have to get her a Cricket phone. Well... then Kelli starts bugging her to let her borrow gma's cell. It goes back and forth and I leave at that point. Forgot my iPod, went back in and now her and my gpa were arguing about how she needs to get a job and support herself. Shes saying shes been applying at places (kinda funny but not really side note she was on her way to go apply at my job). I leave again for good at that point. Not really sure what happened after that but Kelli and my gpa went to jail. Kelli was released bc she was only arrested bc they thought she had a warrant, but she didnt. Gpa had to stay overnight. Apparently the fought, again, and he broke a coffee mug on her face.
Now this is stressful for a few reasons. Kellis addiction/life choices are hard enough for this family. We cope the best we can. They are both at fault for what happened. Kelli needs to realize that. What he did is wrong but she had total control of how that ended. When they said no she could have left it at that instead of going on and on and on... She is 21 and acts like she's 12. BUT my gpa's declining mental health is depressing. We forget sometimes that hes in his 70's and that has alot to do w/ his mental health I'm sure. What I wanna know is what makes him snap like that? And then he has no remorse. He seriously believes he didnt do anything. He actually said that Kelli ran into his coffee mug. He was telling my gma that he was going to get a restraining order on her. *Sigh

And last AND least is #3. The stress of 2 men in one house. Not fun. Its not too terrible most of the time but Russell does start to tire of his little shadow, Matt, and gets annoyed. Recently Russell was just grumpy about everything and he was venting to me about it. One of the things was Matt. He was whining about stupid stuff. Just really lame and blowing things outta proportion. I even told him how silly he was being. In the middle of this I'm talking to Krystal about it and I make sure to be very clear that Russells being dumb and this isnt a "house" issue we need to discuss or anything. And I proceed to vent to my BFF about how lame my hubs is being. Totally normal. Ok so the next day or 2, Krystal, Russell and I are in the living room, Matt comes over to get something and as he's walking out the door stops at Russell and says
"Do you have a problem w/ me?"
"What?" Russ
"Do you have a problem w/ me?" Matt
"No." Russ
"Thats what I thought you F-ing Pu#&*!" He said the last part as hes walking out the door and then slams it behind him.
What the? Krystal runs out after him and they proceed to have a screaming fight in our front yard. Obviously Krystal told Matt. And even tho she also told him that it wasnt a big deal or was an issue his 21 yr old testosterone driven ego had to call Russell out. Matt should be glad Russell isnt also 21. BC there would have been a fight.

So yeah.... there you have it. Most of my stress layed out for the world to see.